Hi.
I’m very sorry if this question is in the wrong category, but I’m honestly confused on where it should go. I just need help getting through this phase in my life. When i was 15 (I’m currently 17), my life hit a difficult and hard-to-describe phase. Ever since i was 15, it’s like my life has been a gigantic dream, but not in a good way whatsoever. It’s like i’m not here, i’m just wasting away my life. I know it might be hard to understand, but this is the best way i can describe it. My life seems like one gigantic dream. I’m not “living” my life. It’s as though Im seeing it all go by, and I can’t do one thing about it.
Could this be because of a chemical deficiency? Could this be just a teenage phase? I don’t think i could have put this on myself. I don’t do drugs, drink, or smoke, so i know that couldn’t be an answer. But please, i know it might be hard to understand, but please try to e-mail me back as soon as possible. I truly need help through this. Thank you for your time.

ANSWER:

Hi Billy (*name changed for privacy),yes, this is the right place for your question!

I know that a lot of people may tell you that you may have some chemical deficiency and put you on some drug. However, even our body chemistry is caused by our vibration (our thoughts and emotions). To change your issue, you need to focus your thoughts in a positive direction (more on that later).

If you are familiar with the Law of Attraction, you will know that the more you think of something, the more it appears in your life. Since you have been saying over and over to yourself in the past 2 years that life appears to not be real, you have attracted even more of that mental state and experiences in your life. It doesn’t matter how it started, so don’t try to figure that out. That won’t help. What matters now is how to change that and become happy.

Since you bring up the issue of dreams and feeling like you’re wasting your life, let’s talk about your dreams! What are your dreams? What do you want to accomplish in your life? Are there any scenarios, locations, careers or hobbies that you feel called to experience? I know that you must have dreams, for we all do. And as a teenager, you must have a lot!

So, the cure for you my dear is to start thinking about your passion(s), and then DO IT. Start with baby steps, but do your best to move forward with it. Then you will find yourself really living!
[You may wish to start with a free online class I created called "Find Your Passion", which is located here: http://kissesandhearts.com/classes/free-class-find-your-passion/]

The question of “What Excites Me?” is the most important question to ask yourself.

It may help you to know that many people experience what you are now experiencing, and actually, it is a very good thing because it means that you are going through a TRANSFORMATION. Obviously for you, when you hit 15, the life you knew, as a child, started to change. What your parents live or believe is no longer enough. You are now at a stage where you are ready to define yourself!

So how do you want to define yourself? Who do you want to become? That’s what life is asking of you now, and if you follow your excitement and intuition no matter what anyone else says, you will become a very happy and empowered young man. And very quickly too!

It’s very important that you define a very clear intention for yourself. Again, something that calls you and excites you. When you have a clear positive self-defined direction in your life, you will feel much better. You’ll know where you’re headed, and it will feel magical!

You’re ok kid. Nothing’s wrong with you. Now go out there and become the person you really want to be (because that’s who you actually are)!

Lots of love to you,
Len Sone
certified Life Coach